With Thanksgiving: Jesus the Atoning One

Atoning One

With joy and happiness we sing

Our praise to Christ the King.

He gives us life. He gives us love.

We sing our thanks to heav’n above

For the Atoning One.

He came to earth, a tiny son

Of The Most Holy One.

He learned like we do, grace by grace

And soon He knew His special place

As the Atoning One.

The time was near when He must die

“Remove this cup” He cried.

But knowing that we needed Him

He took our punishment for sin.

He’s our Atoning One.

So from His sorrow we are saved

The pathway home He paved.

And if we will repent we’ll find

An inner joy, and peace of mind

From the Atoning One.

And with this new peace we will sing

Our praise to Christ the King.

He gives us all He has to give.

If we will follow Him we’ll live

With the Atoning One.

by Sher

With Thanksgiving: The Heart Doctor

Yesterday I opened one of our daily newspapers (yes, I was a sucker and bought another one from the salesman outside of Walmart -- but it was a good deal!) and there was a picture of Jake's heart doctor.  I was surprised by how pleased I was to see him there. I am very thankful for heart doctors.  Seeing this particular picture reminded me of when this doctor called us personally on the phone to tell us that Jake didn't need to be on oxygen anymore.  We weren't home when he called, but we were all so excited about the message that we jumped around the kitchen cheering.  We were rather tired of "tank" -- which is what we called Jake's oxygen tank for the almost 4 months it was with us. 

This same Dr. gave us the good news that, if Jake didn't have his scar, not even a heart doctor would be able to know that anything had ever been wrong with Jake's heart.  His repair worked.  This doctor was there when Jake was three days old, being impressed with how well Jake did during and after surgery and has been Jake's heart doctor (cardiologist) for the almost 9 years since then.  Jake had two very excellent heart surgeons also.

I do realize that we are very blessed.  Not all parents of heart patients get good news or have their children do so well.  Some hearts cannot be fixed.  However, all are blessed by these people, who decided to study for years and years so that they can fix many of the hearts that come broken in some way.  Because these doctors, and others before them, chose to do that, I got to keep my little boy.  I am very thankful for that.

With Thanksgiving: My Family

I love my family. They are so good to me.

I think of them when things seem bad and a smile comes to me.

My Grandma’s all have blessed my life in many different ways –

Now gone from me, but remembering them brings smiles to my days.

The Grandpa’s I’ve been blessed to know were good men to the core.

And when I went to visit they would greet me at the door.

They seemed so glad to see me, and so sorry when I left.

I like to just remember and it leaves me feeling blessed.

My parents are my heroes. I know their love is true.

They have shown me this in everything they say and that they do.

My brothers and my sisters give me their love, and more.

They’ve helped me up when I felt down a thousand times before.

Their love is always constant and I count on them a lot.

I know from past experience what a treasure I have got.

The nieces and the nephews, that I am blessed to know

Bring moments of enjoyment and I love to watch them grow.

I’ve been blessed with a husband, who’s unfailingly kind,

He’s thoughtful and compassionate and he’s my most brilliant find.

My children each are precious. I’ve loved them from the start.

And thinking of the good they do can always warm my heart.

My Aunts and Uncles, kindly, have loved me very well,

And my cousins have some stories that I’m sure they’d love to tell,

Of childhood adventures, and moments here and there,

When we’ve been blessed to have a little time that we could share.

I was married to a good man with a good family

Who have treated me so kindly, that I could clearly see

That to them I am important, and loved in every way,

And for this I am thankful, every single day.

Each member of my family is a blessing sure and true,

And for Thanksgiving you should know that I love you.

Zombie Mom versus Thanksgiving

I confess to feeling like the Zombie Mom today.  In fact, I think I've been feeling like a Zombie Mom for a while.  What's a Zombie Mom?  It's someone who is giving a few too many blank stares and sitting in the chair almost every time they walk by it.  It's me walking like a Zombie around the house (slowly -- but with hands hanging down instead of out in front of me -- unless it's dark).  I whine.  And frown.  And I moan about the messes.  I just want to go somewhere dark and curl up in a ball -- maybe for a whole day.  So, am I stuck being a Zombie Mom forever?  How will I cure the sad case of Zombi-itus?

Well, this morning early when Derek was supposed to be playing ball he threw the door open and in a less than cheery voice said "The house is flooded".  The zombie climbed out of bed and went to work. But, in an attempt to send the Zombie running, I did notice that when we woke up the children they pitched right in and helped and when we called the neighbor (and maybe woke them up too) they came right over with their handy water sucking vacuums and even offered to stay even though it was time to get kids ready for school.

Other events have brought out the zombie side of me this week.  Sick kids, (but now they're well -- mostly), van brakes needing repair (but they are fixed), the van window getting stuck down (but it miraculously recovered before a trip to the shop!), Dan being naughty (but he had to go in the tub because of it which allows me to type), the house getting messy (but  -- well it's still messy), dinner needing to be cooked --every day (but I've done pretty well for me).

Today the Zombie is fighting hard to stick around.  I've got to go use that vacuum again, and rescue Dan from his de-smellifying bath.  There are a thousand and one things to pick up, clean up, and put away.  But, I am determined to remember that it's November and that there are lots of people and things to be thankful for too.  So, with Thanksgiving in mind I'm off to fight the Zombie.

Puppets, Pictures, Pies, and Precious People

Jake and Trisa at Trisa's early birthday celebration.

 We celebrated Trisa's 20th birthday on Thursday -- a few days early.  We bought her a cake to share with roommates, and took her some presents.  I think we forgot to sing to her.

She liked (or pretended to like) all of her presents.  She liked us coming to visit.  She loved the complements Dan kept giving her such as "Trisa, your ground here is really nice".  Or "Wow, what a nice table -- it's square and soft."

Kayli, Sherie (that's me!), Derek, Jake, Trisa, Connor, Tia, and Dan

Here we all are in her new apartment.  Trisa is a beautiful girl (as you can see!) who we love very much.  She knows how to have fun and to include everyone.  She cares about people and tries hard to help them.  She knows what is right and does her best to do it.  She has musical talent and sports skills.  She likes doing the movie quote game with her Dad and laughing as much as possible. We are really happy that she is enjoying college even though Dan has a point when he complains that college takes a "long, long, long, long time".

Happy Birthday Trisa!


Before Trisa turned 20, I turned 20 plus some.  Because of all of the thoughtful, incredibly fun, skilled, nice people in my life I had a fabulous birthday.  I asked my husband to get me puppets for my birthday.  I like to be silly sometimes and it seems easier to do this with a puppet on my arm.  So, he got me a princess and an Oscar the Grouch (to match my Oscar the Grouch shirt that I already own).  What fun!  Dan renamed Oscar "Silver" because I was rather paralyzed by the fact that I don't do a good Oscar the Grouch voice and so he needed a new name.  Dan usually is Silver and I'm the Princess.  You know we have fun because Dan requests that I make the puppet come to life quite regularly.  A few days after my birthday I got another nice surprise.  A friend of mine remembered me telling her how much fun I had being "Mange" and "Sunny Sunshine" for a family reunion with some borrowed puppets.  She sent me a Lion puppet.  This one has a mane a lot less mangey looking than the last puppet I used so I'm still debating on a name.  There is a picture below and some suggestions.  Feel free to vote!

Everyone was super nice on my birthday sending me greetings by phone,  facebook, nice notes, or even in person.  I was taken to lunch on my birthday and a few days later.  One friend gave me a drawing of my husband and me.  What skill!  Another friend made me a yummy pie.  My kids made me nice notes and pictures.  Mandy tended at the last minute.  So many thoughtful people made for a super happy birthday.  I didn't stop to feel old on my birthday.  I was too busy enjoying the fun.  Thank you!

Pincess Catherine Castlehoff, Lion (Spike, Elvis, or the new Mange?), and "Silver" the Grouch

Bonjour Paris

It seems that when I talk to people about the fabulous trips we go on, many feel that the trips are wasted on me.  I have to disagree.  I might not do the same things that you would do, or enjoy the same things that you would enjoy.  It is extremely likely that I would not try as many foods as you would try.  However, I enjoy seeing historic places, walking with Derek for miles and miles (I enjoy this until my feet hurt), and spending time with friends from Derek's work.  And then, after appreciating it to the best of my ability, I gratefully come home to the country and the family that I love the best.

Paris is a very large city.  2 million people live there.  2 million more come to work there every day.  More millions live in the suburbs and lots and lots of people visit.  Paris is crowded and loud.  There are cars, scooters, and motorcycles.  There are buses and the rumble of the metro.  There are sirens and the constant sound of horns blaring.  The streets are full of people driving in the most dangerous looking fashion I've ever witnessed.  It was fascinating to watch.  The sidewalks are full of people walking every which way -- and often smoking as they go.  There are the constant smells of tobacco and exhaust -- mixed in with the occasional smell of food.  It is all a bit overwhelming for someone who has lived in small towns her whole life.

Paris is also fascinating.  There is something historic to be seen almost everywhere you go.  There are fabulous churches and monuments.  When you walk around you get constant reminders of the people who once lived there, and who shaped Paris, and the country of France, into what it is today.  You also discover that their blocks are triangles and it's kind of easy to get a little lost.  You also get constant reminders that their sculptors didn't like to put many clothes on the statues.

What did I enjoy?  I enjoyed watching the wild traffic.  I enjoyed walking the gardens of the Louvre with Derek and then sitting and watching the Plaza de la Concorde as people came and went.  I enjoyed walking under the Eiffel Tower at night and then walking along the river Seine on the way back to the hotel.  I enjoyed the dinner cruise on the river Seine -- except the smoked salmon that looked raw and the smell of deisel fuel.  I was impressed with the expansive gardens at Versailles.  Our trip to the Loire valley was beautiful and the castles were impressive.  I enjoyed visiting with people from work who appreciate Derek and his humor.  And, I even enjoyed the fact that the grocery store we went to was named "Ed".  We visited Ed twice.

If you are one who still thinks the trip was wasted on me it is probably because you wish you could have come-- and if you had -- then I would have enjoyed it more because it would have been more like home.

Pictures and big events.

Arranging pictures in a blog is apparently not my talent -- yet.  The first picture is Jake on his baptism day.  He was baptized March 7th and it was a very nice day.  Our boy who has thought church was "too long" for as long as I can remember was excited to be baptized and it turned out to be a really happy day.  Lots of family came to help celebrate the occasion and Jake was happy will everything.

The second picture is Jake receiving his bobcat award in Cub Scouts.  The new bobcats get to hide and the Webelos find them and carry them in on a stick.  Jake has loved Cub Scouts so far.

This next picture is Connor at that same pack meeting with his friend Kevin.  They were the clowns and told lots of jokes.  They did an excellent job and seemed surprisingly comfortable in front of the crowd.

These next pictures, including one of the ones above are of the anniversary trip that Derek planned for us.  We went south to Zion National Park.  It was our 22nd anniversary and this was a fun adventure.   We visited the St. George Temple, had dinner with Quinn and Tonya, laughed at Brian Regan (he wanted us to -- we weren't being mean), and hiked a lot.  It was all fun. The first picture is on the way to Hidden Canyon and the last two are actually in Hidden Canyon.   There have been other big events that I haven't recorded.  Tia had a birthday in April and we had a good trip that week too.  Derek had a birthday too.  Connor started playing ball and school is almost over.  Besides that -- Dan has eaten lots of snacks and he needs another one right now.

Good Christian Men --- Rejoice!!

As the mother of girls who are grown up -- or almost grown up -- I have had the chance lately to be extremely grateful for the good Christian men in my life and in the lives of my children.  It's a new kind of terrifying to have a daughter old enough that she could choose to get married if she wanted to.  It's less terrifying because she's smart and even less terrifying because she has good Grandpas, a good Dad, and lots and lots of good Uncles to look to as a guide for what a good Christian man is like.  So today I want to say a quick thank you, thank you, thank you to all of the men who know how to live the gospel in such a way that my girls look up to you and enjoy your company.  I have hopes that my girls will find someone like you.

To all of the wives of those men -- give them a thanks from me.  Because of them I can be more hopeful than terrified.  My girls will, when the time is right, find good Christian men -- and then we can rejoice!

Please Pass the Possibilities

Have you ever had a problem that is so hard that you have given up on finding a solution?  You've hit a dead end, or you've found a giant chasm in the path and you don't know what to do.  Wouldn't you like to sit down at a table and say, "Please pass the possibilities," and then have them handed to you?  Well, in some ways I think life is like that if we do not allow ourselves to give up.

We take our troubles to the family table.  Heavenly Father is there and lots of brothers and sisters -- some who are expert in fields you may never have even heard of.  You sit down and tell Heavenly Father all about the problem and what you have done so far.  Then you say "Would you please pass the possibilities?" -- and he does!  You are so happy!  And then you look more closely at them and realize you don't like either of the possibilities you've been given.  You ask if you can exchange them and he says "No, those are good for you, you have to keep them"  (It's a little like being handed your two least favorite vegetables to eat).  Now you have a choice -- you can leave the table and storm and fuss and get very mad -- forgetting that you now have possibilities when you didn't before.  You can stay at the table and keep them and feel a bit sorry for yourself.  Or you could stay at the table, keep them, and ask for more possibilities.

Much to your surprise, you are given more!  Perhaps Heavenly Father hands them to you directly, or perhaps, he passes them around the table and you get them through your brothers and sisters.  When you look at these you are not sure about them but you take them.  One possibility, when you try it, ends up making that first possibility you were given easier to handle (like being given cheese sauce to go with that broccoli).  One you're not sure about, but it turns out that once you've accepted it, it makes you see clearly what you have gained from that first thing you had to keep.  Maybe you even get a possibility that seems a lot like dessert!

I am thankful to have been reminded in a few different ways lately that even if I can't see a possibility for a solution, it doesn't mean that their isn't one.  Miracles happen.  When I see a dead end, or a giant chasm -- I might be able to look from a different view point and discover that the road continues or that there is a bridge I hadn't seen.  When I face a challenge and feel weak, and angry, and worried, I can turn to Heavenly Father and find power, and love, and a sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7). 

In the future I hope to always remember that if a problem seems impossible to solve, I can ask --"Please pass the possibilities!"

Food Allergies: Part Last

I'm about ready to move on to a new topic -- but here are a few last things I've learned.

1.  Make your own cookbook -- when you find something that works type it up and stick it in your book.  It makes looking for recipes at dinnertime less complicated.

2.  When you start to get frustrated again remember that there are resources that you might not know about yet and start looking.  Sometimes help is a google search away.

3.  I read somewhere that it is better to treat an allergy matter of factly.  Don't treat your child like they are picked on and they are less likely to think that they are.

4.  Finally, be willing to ask questions --  so here is one for you:

Dan one day will go to school, he will have birthday parties to attend and ball games with treats.  At some point, no matter how matter of factly I treat his allergy, he is bound to feel a bit picked on because he will be different.  Any suggestions on how to help him through that?  Most of you won't have had to deal with that before -- but neither have I -- any ideas?

Dealing With Food Allergies (Part 2)

Derek and I both come from good families.  We like to spend time with them as much as we can.  Dan has lots of cousins and Aunts and Uncles.  We try to get together for family reunions with both sides of the family once a year and we get together with those who are close by a lot more often.  Food of some kind is almost always involved.  All of a sudden I found that these occasions could be some of the most frustrating times for me.  Food is a lot easier to control in your own home!

So what did I do to turn these times back to the relaxing, enjoyable things they used to be?  The one thing I do is to call in advance to find out the menu so I'll know what I need to bring.  I've forgotten to call before and that is stressful!  The other thing that has helped make these events enjoyable again is what others have done and continue to do to help.  I have cried tears of gratitude over some of these things when nobody was looking.

When Dan was almost two it was time for the family reunion on my side of the family.  It was to be held at my sister Jenny's home where I had seen cousins track food all over the house before.  Almost two year olds are not always very discriminating on where they pick up their snacks.  We would be having meals there for a couple of days and going to the store or home were not really good options.

This is where my angel Mother and one of my thoughtful sisters came to the rescue.  Mom and Jenny planned the entire reunion's meals around what Dan could have.  They even thought carefully about snacks and made sure that there were snacks that Dan could have too.  I found upon arrival that all of the cousins had been warned to be careful what and where they ate and to make sure Dan didn't have anything without his parents knowing.  My nephew Seth who was 6 at the time was particularly vigilant at looking out for Dan and I was very touched by his concern.

On Derek's side of the family we have meals together at least monthly.  I have been so thankful for the times my sisters-in-law have read labels in order to make sure the meal was something Dan could eat!  Other times, when something not Dan safe is planned, they are thoughtful about letting me know so that I can plan in advance how to handle the meal for Dan.  My mother-in-law buys lots of popsicles and Dan has come to think of that as the treat he eats at Grandma's (besides fruit snacks).  Even when I bring cake that he can have or cookies, he often opts for a popsicle.  It makes me smile when I look and find that several cousins have joined him in having popsicles instead of ice cream.

At church the primary leaders have bought treats that Dan can have so he will be safe and his teachers sometimes call me from the store and read me labels just to be sure.  On top of that, a couple of our neighbors who are aware of Dan's allergies went out of their way at Christmas time to bring treats just for Dan (blond oreos and popsicles) because he can't have so many of the goodies we get.

I don't think I was ever so thoughtful for people I knew with food allergies.  It seems so surreal that someone can die from eating something that most other people have every day.  It's hard to believe that such a thing can be real until you see it -- or experience it yourself!  I appreciate what good family members, friends, and neighbors we have had who have gone out of their way to think about it when they don't have to.

So, in dealing with food allergies it is good to plan ahead, and call in advance.  It is also good to know great people like we do who help keep my Dan safe and me sane.

Dealing with Food Allergies (Part 1)

Since Dan was one we have changed the way we eat at our house.  That was when we first started discovering his food allergies.  You might be surprised to know that my first reaction to his food allergies (besides fear) was anger.  I was angry at the food that could kill him.  I was angry that cooking, which I don't really love, just got harder.  I was angry that Dan would probably never get to enjoy some of the foods that I had loved the most.  (I say had because I was so angry at peanuts that I quit eating the food that has been my main staple for years -- peanut butter).  I was angry that he couldn't eat what everyone else ate.  I was angry that school, and parties, and even family gatherings were going to be complilcated.  Thankfully, there were three things that helped me to get past the anger.

1.  I have a friend who has dealt with multiple food allergies in her family.  She told me what to look for on lables and she gave me a couple of recipes to help.  I believe she cooks three different dinners for her family every day since they are not all allergic to the same things.  I was impressed with how matter of factly she dealt with the situation.  Somewhere along the line she had already learned that being frustrated and angry didn't help anyone.  Her understanding, patience and example were priceless.

2.  I read in one of my fiction books (I can't remember which one) that being angry with a situation we are given in life is the same as being angry at God.  That made me stop and think.  Heavenly Father knows about Dan's allergies and I know that being angry at God is not a good idea.  I started trying harder to not be angry.  Thinking about this idea helped me to be ready for #3.

3.  I went to a Relief Society meeting where a lady spoke about her son being diagnosed with diabetes.  She spoke about how hard it was for her.  Her situation sounded harder than mine -- but it was similar in some ways too.  After describing her challenges she told us about a question she had been asked.  If she could go back and choose to have her son be free of diabetes would she?  She was surprised to find the answer was not a clear "YES!"  She said that her son is very compassionate, and thoughtful.  She felt that this was a result of his experience with diabetes.  As a result of her son's diabetes she had learned to communicate with Heavenly Father better and to feel His compassion and love more clearly.  Maybe that "YES!" would take away the good things too.  Listening to her helped me to see that I was angry over something that might be an important part of Heavenly Father's plan for me, and Dan, and our family.  Perhaps I couldn't see the good things that could come from this hard thing.

Thanks to these three things, I have been able to stop being angry and to deal with food allergies more matter of factly -- like my friend.  This is a situation that we have been given and it is up to us to handle it the best way we can.  Eventually we may even be able to sincerely give thanks for the opportunity to experience life with food allergies.  Maybe we will look back and find that we are more patient, or compassionate, or thoughtful because of this situation.  One day we will clearly see the good that has come to us because of a hard thing.  In the meantime, we won't waste time being angry.

Celebrating Easter

Today I feel like sharing an Easter idea that I got from a book by Jill Rigby (Raising Unselfish Children in a Self-Absorbed World). The idea is hers but I have modified it slightly. This activity helps us and our children to know what Jesus did on that original Easter week. It is particularly good for those with children at home. You start this activity on Palm Sunday (the Sunday before Easter) and it goes for the whole week -- but it isn't hard!

Every day read the scripture given and then do the activity. The activities you do every day create an Easter display so find a good location for one and get ready! You can display the scriptures you read too if you want to. Modify the idea to make it work for you -- I did!

Palm Sunday (Christ's triumphal entry into Jerusalem)

Blessed be the King that cometh in the name of the Lord: peace in heaven, and glory in the highest. (Luke 19:38)

Activity: Color pictures of palm fronds and place them on the table with the donkey (taken from your Christmas nativity set). You could also read Luke 19: 30-38 and Matthew 21: 8-11 and Luke 19: 39-40 if your kids have a longer attention span -- or tell the story in your own words.

Monday

...he taught the people in the temple, and preached the gospel...(Luke 20:1)

Activity: display a picture of the temple in Jerusalem (Jesus had cleansed the temple the day before and taught there during the week)

Tuesday

And in the day time he was teaching in the temple; and at night he went out, and abode in the mount that is called the Mount of Olives. (Luke 21:37)

Activity: display a picture of the Mount of Olives

Wednesday

Then entered Satan into Judas surnamed Iscariot, being of the number of the twelve. And he promised, and sought opportunity to betray him unto them in the absence of the multitude. (Luke 22: 3, 6)

Activity: display 30 pieces of silver (30 nickles or other silver money)

Thursday

And being in an agony he prayed more earnestly: and he sweat as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground. (Luke 22:44)

Activity: display a picture of the Garden of Gethsemane and consider a special family prayer thanking Heavenly Father for the atonement that Jesus made for each of them.

Friday

And when Jesus had cried with a loud voice, he said, Father, into thy hands I commend my spirit: and having said thus, he gave up the ghost. (Luke 23:46)

Activity: Make three crosses (use twigs from the yard or whatever you think will work) and add them to your display. Also make a tomb and seal it with a rock. (This can even be a toilet paper roll decorated in some way with a rock in front.)

Saturday

And they (Jesus' friends) returned, and prepared spices and ointments; and rested the Sabbath day according to the commandment. (Luke 23:56)

Activity: rest

Sunday

He is not here, but is risen...(Luke 24:6)

Activity: Open the tomb -- take the time to listen to "He is Risen" or another Easter song and consider saying another prayer thanking Heavenly Father for the resurrection.

Have a happy Easter learning what Jesus did on that important week so many years ago!