Yes, And -- People Are Afraid

YES the world can be scary, AND there is beauty in it.

Today I have been thinking about how fear is ruling a lot of conversations and turning what should be discussions into shouting matches, or name calling, or worse.  I doubt people are even aware that fear is what is behind what they are saying.  I'm sure most of us humans feel like we are standing up for what is true, or right, or even safe.  The problem with that kind of standing up for "truth, right, and safety" is that it creates an even larger divide, and therefore a bigger problem.  To have a true discussion we need to go into a conversation thinking that there is a possibility we might learn something.  We also need to realize that there is power in "Yes, and..."

Do people say mean and hurtful things?  Yes, and nobody on this planet is all bad.  Do our leaders sometimes do things we don't agree with and that are bad?  Yes, and they also do things that are good sometimes!  Does our country seem to be headed towards an even bigger divide instead of unity?  Yes, and if we can see the fear behind the yelling, and really take the time to listen, there is hope.  When we understand each other we will be able to let go of fear and find ways to compromise that allow each person safety and hope for a brighter future.

If someone yells at us, or calls us names, we can get really curious about why.  I suspect that under all of their unkindness and bluster is fear.  We can say "YES, I disagree with you, AND I don't appreciate being called names, AND I want to understand why you feel so strongly about your opinion.   And then we can listen.  Really listen to understand and not to change their opinion.  If nothing else, hopefully they will feel like their opinion matters, and more importantly, they matter.

Pain, Patriots Day, and Praise

Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash

Yesterday Charlie Kirk was killed at UVU.  Today is the anniversary of the terrorist attack on the U.S. that killed so many.  There is so much pain in the world, and yet there is good too.  I drove to the store today and saw many places that were flying, or displaying the stars and stripes -- the U.S. flag.  It reminded me of the much too short season after the terrorists attacks when it seemed like our country was united.  We had a common enemy, a common sadness and fear.  We lived in a country of freedom and were united against tyranny.

We still have a common enemy, and that is hate.  Hate brings fear, and division, and violence.  That enemy is conquered by love.  Love listens to understand, love knows that it is okay to be different and that compromises can only come if we take the time to talk to people, and listen.  Especially listen.  Let us unite behind the banner of freedom to love, help, understand, and forgive.

I have a vision statement that I write most days.  I change it occasionally and recently added "I praise God in every situation."  This statement has been a good reminder when hard things, or difficult feelings crop up.  There is always, always, something to be thankful for, which means there is always something to praise God for.  I praise Him for people who rush into danger to help.  I praise Him for all of those who reach out in love to those who are hurting.  I praise Him for the freedom to choose, which is also the freedom to learn and grow and forgive.

Today there is pain, grief, and loss.  Today there is also love, hope, and healing.  I choose to praise God for love, and for all who choose love over hate.