How To Turn Your World Right Side Up

Like most people, I have days, weeks, or even months when things don't seem to go my way.  Sometimes I feel like I put my foot in my mouth every other minute, or I get headaches or shoulder aches.  Perhaps something I really want to have happen just doesn't, or people I love are struggling and I don't know how to help.  There are even times when I have had my world turned upside down by frustration or anger.  There are so many reasons our worlds can tip over that I can't count them.  However, I have been surprised to find that, no matter how the problems vary, the answer is often the same.  The answer is gratitude.  Gratitude doesn't always right my world 100 percent, but it always starts it tilting in the right direction.

This may seem too simplistic, but it really is extremely helpful for me to remember what I do have instead of counting what I don't.  It's nice to be thankful for the times I didn't stick my foot in my mouth, and the times that I do feel good.  I am thankful for modern medicine, and people who help me lift my loads, whatever they may be.  I am thankful that if I don't know what to do to help someone I can pray, and get inspiration, or at least leave the problem with Heavenly Father who knows better!  What a blessing! 

Sometimes my world has felt upside down and I have not known why.  On these occasions I go to the temple and find that, when praying for help, it is usually the gift of gratitude that I am given and it is such a generous and helpful gift!  I come away remembering that I am loved, and blessed.  Gratitude always makes my problems seem a lot smaller.

There are days when I want to feel grateful, but I struggle.  I find myself giving thankful prayers like this:  "Thanks for the kids, but I wish they would clean up more.  Thanks for the food, but I wish someone else would make it.  Thanks for the plants, but I wish the weeds wouldn't grow."  It becomes a little humorous in a tragic kind of way.  I think feeling grateful is a gift from heaven, and when we don't feel grateful we can ask for that gift, and then try our best to be thankful even if it is not given to us right away.  One thing I know for sure -- being grateful, or even trying to be grateful, will not make things worse.  It is very likely to turn your world right side up!

*Picture from google images

Fiercely Loyal: Christensen Reunion 2013

The Christensen Reunion is always packed with activities.  Derek's parents have 49 grandchildren and there are usually 22 adults.  This year Uncle Bryon couldn't come, but Trisa's Travis came and so the number of people was the same.  I can't possibly adequately recap the reunion, but I can share a few of my favorite moments, and the ridiculously few pictures I took.

I liked Devin's devotional about Sir Thomas Moore and being fiercely loyal to what we know to be right.  Devin is always interesting, easy to hear, and articulate, with a bit of amusing thrown in for good measure.  I also liked his prayer for those working at night in the cherry industry since he was saying it for Kayli's benefit. 

I liked going for a walk at night up at Derek's parent's cabin with Derek and some of our kids and some of Megan and Leon's kids while Leon went down to retrieve a key we needed to get in.  I also liked that Leon energetically played a game with the kids even though it was late, making things more fun for them.

I really enjoyed watching Derek entertain his nieces this reunion.  It was so fun to watch them get really close up to him and argue whatever silly statement he had just made.  They giggled and laughed and it was fun to watch.

I love that the aunts and uncles love my children and care about what is happening in their lives -- it makes my children's lives better and I am so thankful that they have such good role models to turn to for a listening ear, and advice.

I liked that Travis jumped right in and helped with as many things as he could, and that he and Trisa were happy.

I enjoyed watching the music videos that we were assigned to make.  I was NOT thrilled to make one, but we ended up laughing really hard when we watched it, and we enjoyed all of the others too.

Finally, Connor and Porter challenged their Aunt Megan, who is a terrifically good sport, to a dance off.  Connor and Porter learned Napoleon Dynamite's dance, and Megan ended up recruiting some nieces to dance to the Minion's version of YMCA.  That was fun!  Dan added himself to her group too -- he couldn't resist doing a few moves!

 Aunt Megan -- Dance off Queen

 Good Uncle Derek trades hats with Sara

 Sara is in pink with Derek's hat

 Tyler carrying everyone's snacks for the hike.

 Trisa modeling our reunion tee shirt.

 Laura and Mandy having a chat in the woods.

 Mandy watching the slide -- before her nephews drench her in a water war.

Connor (The Dance off King) at the bottom of the huge slide.

 

On Saturday we had a devotional about being fiercely loyal to our country and its founding principles, and had a great "adult discussion" about communication and loyalty in marriage led by Doran.  All of these things are helpful, and enjoyable.  I think it is easy to be fiercely loyal to such a terrific family!

An Engaging Reunion

The Christensen Family Reunion was held July 18, 19, and 20th.  On Friday the 19th, after the rest of us left Grandma's house to go home for the night, Travis Sonderegger asked Trisa to marry him.  After she said yes he put the beautiful engagement ring on her finger that they had spent the day shopping for.  They will be married December 20th at the Mount Timpanogas Temple.

 

I didn't remember to take any pictures of them myself, but Travis had Connor take a couple and he (Travis) sent them to me.  They had a happy time together, and since they live about five hours away from each other right now, December seems far away.  Hopefully the time will pass quickly for them.

 

Happy engagement to my beautiful Trisa!  The years sure flew by quickly for me. The day after they got engaged I woke up with the words to The Circle of Life from The Lion King running through my head -- "There's far too much to take in here"!  I need to figure out how to be a good Mother of the Bride!

The Grand Ole Opry

Here are some of the fun things we did at the Grand Ole Opry.  My sisters and I sang Blue Moon in a dramatic fashion.  Derek was in charge of the puppet show where Jeff was the hamburger, and Brian was the shark.  Ray, Jenny, Dan, and I had parts too.  Brian sang a couple of songs while accompanying himself on his guitar.  Some of my nieces and Kayli taught us a round and then did a musical number themselves.  We did some sing along numbers where everyone sang.  My sister-in-law Lori showed us some great pictures she had taken, and framed.  Kayli taught line dancing, Tina led the Hokey Pokey, and Jenny and Jeff wowed us with acro yoga.  I have a talented and fun family!  Here are some pictures complements of Lori and Tina.

 

 

The Blessed Fuller Reunion

I love family reunions, but this year I seemed to look forward to the Fuller reunion with extra enthusiasm.  It sounded like a vacation.  Activities planned, great people to hang out with, and people to share in the menu planning, cooking, and cleanup.  The only disappointing thing for me was that Jenny did not feel well, but she is one impressive woman who somehow helped, kept a smile on, and even sang dramatically with Tina and me, even though she was feeling super lousy.

Dan, Hyrum, and Caleb.  Uncle Jeff is fun, and he has a backhoe to give boys rides in.
They loved it!

How many men does is take to get a go-cart running?
Three.  My Dad, and my brothers Brian, and Ray.  Much fun was had riding
the go cart around later.  Max, Jenny and Jeff's dog LOVES riding in the go cart!

 Dan fell asleep on his cousin Lauren's shoulder on the way to our Friday hike.

 Connor!

 These were some great hikers!  They were first to the waterfall.  Unfortunately,

with nobody to curb their enthusiasm, Caleb and Dan were soon sporting owies.

Hyrum was not hurt, except in his feelings.  He wanted to scale the walls like Spiderman

and his Mom thought it was a little dangerous in those shoes.  Poor boys!

 All children should have an uncle like Jeff.  Here he is with his boys Seth (in red) and Owen.

 

 Lauren, and Tina.  We weren't exactly all wearing the perfect hiking shoes!

 Can you find Kayli standing up high?

 I allowed Derek the great honor of taking my picture:)

Dan and Connor

 

Our reunion started on the 4th of July with a parade in Huntsville.  We enjoyed visiting during the day and went to the fireworks at night.  Besides these things, and the hike, we also had talks from both of my parents at different times, and a "Grand Ole Opry" at my Mom's request.  I'll write more about that later.  I had a terrific time and loved getting to visit with all of the family that could come.

Why THAT Goal?

I may have mentioned before that I hate running.  I have thought so for quite a number of years, and it seems to have been cemented in my mind since 9th grade track when I "ran" the half mile, and only placed if there were only three runners.  I barely could keep going for two laps, and I was miserable the whole time.  Then recently I found out that a friend of mine was starting to run, and had even managed to run a mile faster than ever.  My very small, but still existent, competitive side thought, "If she can do it -- so can I!"  So, I made a goal.  I would learn to run a mile.

I found a plan online.  It was supposed to help me learn to run a mile in four weeks -- running three days a week and cross training three days a week.  It did say that if you had troubles with one of the weeks, you should repeat that week before going on.  Off I went.  Week one was a breeze.  Run 1/4 of the track, walk 3/4 four times.  Week two was fine.  Run 1/2 track, walk 1/2 track for a mile.  I've actually lost track of where I became stuck, but more than once I ended up bawling because I just couldn't make it as far as I was "supposed" to.  I panic when I get too tired, and then my breathing becomes worse, and I can no longer convince myself it's possible to keep going.  With time I even discovered that I had to listen to fairly relaxing music to keep me calm as I ran.

After 7 weeks of consistent working I had still not run a mile.  I could torture my way through 1/2 mile, walk 1/4 track and run 3/4 track for the next two laps, but not more.  I tried.  I got a little farther, injured myself a bit, and started dreading running.  I kept at it, but with a different plan.  I would run intervals.  It turns out I kind of enjoy that.  I'm fine to run as long as I know I'll get to walk a little sometimes.  So, finally on Monday I decided that I would run a mile -- but with a little walking every lap.  There is more than one way to run a mile!  Maybe one day I will actually manage to run a mile without ever walking, or maybe not, but I do not regret trying.  It's hard to learn what we can do if we never try!

Persisting in Performing

I remember the first time I performed a flute solo at church.  It was a disaster.  Looking back, it was at least a somewhat funny disaster.  I was SO nervous.  Our congregation was small; maybe 50 people, but they were all staring at me!  As I played I started shaking so hard that my flute was bouncing off of the place below my lips where it is supposed to go.  The sound could not have been good.  I could hear a child in the back of the room say, "Mom, why is her flute bouncing up and down?" and the Mom quietly trying to explain that it was because I was nervous.

Another time I decided to do a duet with a friend for a stake talent show.  It was the same song as I did for the solo, but with a duet part.  We had the piano playing too, just to help us not be so nervous.  My friend lost her spot in the music after a couple of measures, and so while I played two pages myself she asked over and over in a frightened voice, "Sherie.  Where are we?"  It is impossible to keep playing the flute and use your hand to point, and I figured somebody had to keep going!  So, that didn't turn out too well either, but it also provides me with a few chuckles.

After these disasters in performing, people might wonder why I ever did it again.  The truth is, I have learned that if I agree to perform, I am way more likely to practice.  This can help me improve my talent, or at least keep up what I have.  I have also learned that the more I perform, the easier it gets -- though I never find it really easy.  I eventually learned that if I found something to smile about while I was playing, my flute wouldn't bounce around, even though I can still feel my whole body quaking!  People are generally kind, and I notice my mistakes more than anyone else.  Since I mostly play at church, I like to pray that the music I play will help people to feel the Holy Ghost, and doing this generally gives me the help I need to do well enough. 

I have other "war" stories of performing, like the time I got done playing, sat down in front of the congregation, and cried the entire rest of the meeting.  Or the time I agreed to play a piano solo and it turned out that the week before, Derek was made Bishop, I found out we were not going to have a baby, I had a D and C, attended a family reunion, and played the solo in front of lots of extra family, and with Derek being the Bishop for the first time.  I have never had my legs shake so badly in my life and I found it to be a miracle that I was able to play the song at all.  I even kept going when I got lost and didn't miss the last note like I am prone to do. 

There have been good experiences and I learned something every time.  I love music, and I have found it to be a blessing that I have been able to persist in performing, even though it is hard.

My Favorite Way to Unwind

My favorite way to unwind is to talk to Derek.  After all the kids are in bed I like to tell him all of the trivial little details of my day; what I liked, what made me cry, what was funny, how tired I am.  He "gets" to hear it all.  It makes my day feel more worthwhile somehow to have someone listen to me talk about it.  It gives me a chance to complain, or to ask questions and get ideas.  I look forward to it every day.

I ran into a bit of a difficulty however when Derek was the Bishop.  He would come home on Sundays so tired that he would try to listen, but he would fall asleep, or not be able to focus.  I came to understand that on Sundays, he needed me to be okay without unloading on him.  I just couldn't quite remember how!  When I was young, a journal worked pretty well, but that wasn't enough.  I wanted to feel heard, and understood.

I have prayed since I was younger than I can remember, but I wanted to talk to someone I could see and who I could hear.  However, I soon discovered that prayer was my very best option.  On those long Sundays I came to know without a doubt something that I had, perhaps, not understood before.  Heavenly Father is never too tired, or too busy to listen to me.  I am His child and am important to Him.  He doesn't mind hearing trivial details, and He doesn't find me to be a bother.  He doesn't get angry at me over feelings that I might be angry with me about.  He is patient, loving, comforting, and kind, and while I did not see Him or hear His voice, He did send help, comfort, and peace.

This experience was kind of like being 12 all over again and discovering that, even if nobody else seemed to understand what I was going through, Heavenly Father did.  I still love telling Derek all the details of my day, and having him hear, and understand, but I am thankful for the strengthened testimony of prayer I received during a challenging time.

Help . . . As Close As a Prayer

When Derek was Bishop there were Sundays when he would be gone from around 6:30 a.m. until 5:30 or 6 in the evening.  He was busy fulfilling his calling, and that left me to take care of responsibilities at home.  I have six children.  I worried often that somehow I would not be enough, and they would not like church, or would not gain the testimonies they need because somehow I was lacking.  I wrote in my journal about a couple of those hard Sundays when I was given the blessed reminder that there is help that is as close as a prayer.

After what I called in my journal a "fairly normal day of church and choir" I talked about trying to go over Personal Progress with my girls, and working on Faith and God with Connor (both programs from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints to help children develop their faith and testimonies).  Tia was supposed to help me with dinner and we didn't have the right ingredients, and everyone, including my little boys, seemed to be around me needing something from me.  I felt overwhelmed, and inadequate.  I retreated.  I went to my room and closed and locked it, and then went in my bathroom, turned on our rather loud fan, and locked that door too, just for good measure.

I knelt on the little rug on the tile floor and cried, and prayed.  There was just me.  I knew I couldn't help everyone all by myself but I was the only parent available.  I didn't feel smart enough, or have enough energy!  How could I handle all of those eyes looking at me and needing something?  And then to my mind came a reassurance.  Heavenly Father needed Derek elsewhere but He would not leave me alone!  It was like a window opened and I knew exactly what I could do to handle the needs of my children that day.  With that knowledge came the energy to carry out the plan, and more importantly the reminder that I am not alone, and had not been abandoned.  The help I needed was just a prayer away!

A touch of . . . .

HOME

You have a loving Father
In heaven up above,
And an older brother
Who taught the world of love.
You have their words in scripture,
So you will know the way
To make it back to heaven
To live with them someday.

 Our home up there is happy,
We're loved and understood,
Our wants and needs are known,
And the feeling there is good.
Our Father's not too busy
To hear our hearts' complaint
Or to listen to our joys
Or to strengthen us when faint.

 And though we are not home now
He'd like us to come back;
He sent His only Son
To give us what we lack.
Our brother made it possible
To bridge the chasm wide,
And if we turn our hearts to Him
He'll help us to His side.

 Father never feels too weary,
Or thinks we matter not
For we are all His children,
And He loves us all a lot.
He lets us choose our own way.
He will not force us home.
He'll let us walk in darkness,
And on thorny pathways roam.

 But He is ever calling
Hoping we will hear
Knowing if we'll stop to pray
That we could feel Him near.
If we will look He'll lead us
From darkness into light
Onto the straight and narrow path
Where we can choose the right.

And if we do not weary
Of traveling the road,
And call upon Him for help
With carrying our load
The path will lead us home
To that peaceful place above
That is never filled with darkness
And is always filled with love.

Poem by Sher

Dads Are Important

One of my favorite Dad pictures -- Derek with Trisa

Today is Father's Day and I thought I'd write about what I think should be an obvious fact;  Dads are important!  How do I know that Dad's are important?  I know because I have a Dad, and I have a husband who is a Dad, and I know many, many awesome Dads, and I know because prophets say so.

One of the ways I have come to know the importance of Dads is by being a Mom.  Being a Mom is exhausting!  I'm a woman, and I already have so many emotions, and then I need to deal with all of the emotions of my children too!  When I'm tired that is really, really hard (at least if it is to be done gracefully, without yelling).  Sometimes I feel like I can't possibly manage, and that's when Derek comes to the rescue.  We have found that it is unusual for us both to be at our wits end at the same time.  Therefore, when I can't handle something, Derek can.  We back each other up.  I honor any single parent who manages their family without a spouse because it is hard.  I know that it is best, if at all possible, to have a Dad and a Mom.  It is really great to have back up.

Dads are pretty great at making money.  Sometimes their jobs stink, and they have to work long hours doing something they may not love, but families need money to live.  Kids grow constantly and are always needing bigger sizes of things.  It's cold in the winter (at least here) and we need heat, and blankets, and we love our soft beds.  There are so many things that are needed and wanted, and it is great that Dads are willing to work hours and hours to provide these nice things for the people they love the most.  Women can earn money too, but families are usually better off because of a Dad who is doing the best he can to take care of his family financially.

Dads are fun.  In my house Dads are the most fun.  I am here all of the time.  I often feel so responsible that I forget to relax and have fun.  Dads often know how to play, and they make family time more fun.  Derek coming home is truly something we look forward to!

Having a good Dad in the home brings such a feeling of security to children -- especially if Dad loves Mom!  Everything is better for a child and a family if there is a good Dad.  I honor the Dads in my life.  My Dad is important to me,  My Dad-in-law is important to me, Derek is important to my children and me, and my nieces and nephews are all blessed by good Dads who are important to them.  I know without any doubt that Dads are Important!

New Things

This is the new floor in the exercise / guest room.   Dan had to be in the picture since he's in the other ones of our new floors.  This floor was the hardest of the four laminate floors we have to put in.  It would not click together properly.  It took two days, (a little over one full day of work) but it looks lovely!



This is Jake sitting in one of the two new camp chairs Derek got for Father's Day.  We lost one of our other chairs, and threw away a broken one.  Derek's is the fancy one on the right.

This is my new car.  It was a bit of a surprise for me.  Derek asked me about it on Thursday and we bought it on Friday.  It is a Toyota Sienna.  The old van will go to Tia in Cedar City so that she and Trisa won't have to take turns being stranded at their apartment.  They've been sharing Derek's old Acura.  Tia is a little bummed that she has to drive a van.  It is not a fun college car.  I will miss it though.  We've had it since Jake was a baby and it has been a good van for me!  The new one is fun and I will adjust quickly.  It's really easy to go too fast in this one!

Connor's 15th Birthday

Connor and his birthday loot.

Connor reading his birthday book.  He finished it at 1:00 a.m. -- Monday early

Connor blowing out a number one candle and five candles.

He's 15, not 6!

 

Connor had a good birthday.  He often looked tired, but that is because he got home from youth conference the night before and hadn't slept much.  He obviously wasn't too tired to stay up reading long past the time he should have been snoozing!  His dessert was brownie trifle (Brownies, chocolate pudding, and cool whip).  Mmmmm! 

 

He did spend three hours at church where we told as many people as we could that it was his birthday.  Later, over the phone, Connor enjoyed some singing from Grandma and Grandpa Fuller.  The evening was spent at Grandma and Grandpa Christensen's house where he got to pick songs for us all to sing because it was his birthday.

 

Connor also got to go on a birthday date with his Grandparents C. on Monday.  This is a favorite tradition.  He loved eating shrimp, bowling, and getting more books at a book store.  Connor can never have too many books!

 

Connor is a terrific son.  He is helpful, kind, smart, and funny.  We love him.