Hiding

A closet -- but not the one my Dad built for me.

Last night I was remembering a time when I was somewhere between the age of eight and 11 when my family lived in Kentucky.  My Dad had built me a room in the basement -- right at the bottom of the stairs.  In my room he built me a fabulous closet.  It was a walk in closet with very sturdy shelves, and it was my very favorite place to go when I felt like hiding.  I would climb up those shelves and sit at the very top and just listen.  I liked that nobody ever found me until I wanted to be found, but that I could hear them looking.  I liked being up high looking at things from a different perspective, and I liked the break from dealing with whatever seemed hard for me at the time.

Over the years I have often hidden when I feel overwhelmed.  Sometimes I hide and pray.  Sometimes I hide and listen to people looking for me.  Other times I hide hoping that I can find a different perspective, or at least the energy to deal with whatever it is that seems hard at the time.  Hiding in this way has sometimes been a good thing like hiding in my closet was when I was a child.  Other times it has just been me avoiding dealing with a problem.  It has been me wishing that the hard things would fix themselves.  It is me feeling inadequate, and just not knowing what to do, and being afraid to try.  I have hidden instead of asking for the help I really want.  I have often convinced myself that hiding when I am having a hard time is doing everyone else a favor.

Hiding is a way of coping, and I do not think it is always bad, but there are cases when it is just pride.  It is not wanting to admit that I need help and can't do everything by myself.  It is me trying to hide my imperfections as if everyone doesn't already know that I am imperfect.  Sometimes hiding is as foolish as trying to hide sins from God.  He knows about the sins, and wants to help, but can't help until we come out of hiding and let Him.  When there are problems to solve, and challenges I don't know how to deal with, hiding in the closet is really not often going to be the quickest way to a solution.  It's okay to hide and pray, and take a small break, but then it is time to come out of hiding and get help.

*Photo by Jose Soriano on Unsplash

Easter Week: Friday -- Cruelty and Pain

The Crucifixion by Harry Anderson
Used by permission from theChurchofJesusChrist.org

When my children were younger we took them up to Salt Lake to see The Testament:  Of One Fold and One Shepherd.  There are scenes during the movie that show people being cruel to Christ.  They show Him nailed to the cross, and in pain.  When I looked over at one of my daughters, she had her head down, with her eyes tightly shut and her hands covering her ears.  She is a sweet and loving person.  Watching the Jesus in the film suffer was too much for her.  I can only imagine how much pain and sorrow Jesus' mother felt as she saw her own son suffer such agony.

Sometimes in this life we may suffer cruelty.  We will have pain.  There is no doubt that Jesus understands what that feels like.  He knows it is hard.  He may even want to hide His face, and close His eyes, and cover His ears and so He does not have to watch someone He loves suffer -- but He does not do that.  Like His mother stayed with Him, He stays with us.  He offers us comfort, and support, and understanding.  He may even take some of our pain, or strengthen us so that we can handle it.  Even if we are hurting to much to recognize it, He is there for us.

I want to be like Jesus.  Instead of avoiding having to see and hear a family member, friend, or stranger suffer, I want to be there offering comfort, and support and understanding.  Jesus has done that for me.  Family, friends, and strangers have done this for me.  Even at times when I have felt alone, and seemed to be alone, I hold on to the knowledge that the Lord is with me, and He loves me.

Listen To The Right Voice!

Christ Walking on the Water
Robert T. Barrett

Satan = the accuser

"He is the one who tells us we are not adequate, the one who tells us we are not good enough, the one who tells us there is no recovery from a mistake.  He is the ultimate bully, the one who kicks us when we are down."

Christ = Helper and Consoler

"His ways bring joy and hope eventually and always."

Quotes by Elder Dale G. Renlund,
"Choose You This Day"  October 2018 General Conference of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. 

Wondering

picture from lds.org

Wondering

I am wondering friend if your life feels too heavy,

If you feel like you’re staggering under the load.

Does your heart hurt so much you’re surprised it’s still beating?

When you look up ahead, are their pits in the road?

Just close your eyes, lift your face towards the heavens

And think of our Father in Heaven above.

Remember He sent His Son down to save you

Jesus’ hands hold the evidence of His great love.

Be really still, and imagine you’re with Him

Our Savior is holding you close to His heart

Imagine His love pouring down ‘til it fills you

He won’t leave you alone, He won’t ever depart.

I’m wondering friend if your life seems too dark now.

Can you not see exactly where to go from here?

Do you feel all alone in the struggle before you?

Stay calm and remember the Savior is near.

Just close your eyes, lift your face towards the heavens

He’s sending His light to push darkness away.

He will mend broken hearts, and lighten your load

In His presence the darkest night turns into day.

Jesus is here for you and all those you care for.

So bask in His presence, hold on to His love.

You are not forgotten, you have friends around you

And you’ll always have help from our Father above.

Written for a friend

by Sherie

Go About Doing Good

Here's Jake doing some good by helping me pick up Teddy
after a traumatic day at the vet getting a pokey weed out of his ear that he managed
to pick up while hiking with Kayli.
Kayli wasn't able to go, and Teddy loves Jake.

One of the keys to happiness is to go about doing good.  In Elder Uchtdorf's talk Believe, Love, Do he says, "The scriptures reveal that the more we love God and His children, the happier we become."  I have found that when I really feel like I have helped someone, I feel joy, peace, and gratitude.  I feel those same things when people help me.

Recently I had a Thursday that I was dreading.  It had already been a busy week and that day I had to get a mammogram.  Because of having a little bit of breast cancer last year this was particularly stressful.  Then I had to get my allergy shots (2 painful pokes).  It was a wet, rainy, gray day, but it ended up being a good day because there were people who "went about doing good" to me, and I had a chance to do some good too.

At the mammogram, which showed that all was well, the lady helping me and I shared our stories of last year.  She had a kidney and pancreas transplant!  I felt like talking with her was maybe helpful to us both.  Then Patty, who often gives me my shots, and who knows how rough last year was, is always so happy to see me, and so sympathetic, and sorry for the pain of the pokes she gives me that getting those shots was not so terrible.  Next I was able to visit Tia and help her with her frustration with figuring out how to apply to be a substitute teacher.  And finally, I was able to pick up a smoothie for Kayli on my way home, which she made me feel good about because she was wanting one, and the place we like to get them is not super close to home.

A day that I was dreading turned out to be a good one because of people who went about doing good, and because I tried really hard to do the same.  (And honestly, it didn't hurt that there was nothing bad on the mammogram!!)