Mike's Happy Birthday

Mike joined our family by marrying Tia over a year ago.  His birthday is August 17th, the day after my Mom's, and last year he was off doing army things on his birthday and so we didn't get to help celebrate a birthday with him until this year.  We had tacos.  There was game playing (Battleship, Skipbo, and Suspend). And then there was the brownie trifle -- with trick candles.  We do enjoy trick candles!

Connor, Tia, Mike and Jake playing Skipbo.  If I overheard correctly, Jake won both times.

Mike's brownie trifle in the Hug mug,
which is a mug I bought for Derek in one of our first years of marriage.
It's a vintage mug :-)

Mike (and maybe Tia) blowing out Mike's candles.
For the first time.

This is probably the 3rd or 4th time.

He thought he finally had them out -- but they were pretty persistent candles!

 It's always good to have Mike around.  We are really glad that he married Tia.  They are good at helping, smiling, laughing, and generally making everything more fun.  Happy Birthday to Mike!

My Mom

Mom and a little Kayli making banana bread.  

Mom and Trisa.  Both of these pictures are obviously old but I love them!

Mom and her famous (in the family) peanut butter pie.
This was Thanksgiving a couple years ago maybe?

Today (the 16th) is my Mom's birthday.  She is beautiful, as you can see.  She is smart.  I can still remember her wanting to learn to be better at speaking, and working at it, and I think she is very good at speaking (giving talks).  She studies a lot, and applies what she learns.  She is kind.  She treats everyone with love.  She is feisty sometimes -- though I can't think of an example really.  My kids love this about her though, and mention it occasionally.  Mom is a very good worker.  I have never been able to outwork my Mom.  After Connor was born she stayed here for two weeks helping and I sometimes just wanted her to stop working already and sit down!!  My house looked awesome for that two weeks!  I should have handed her Connor more -- except babies generally don't want you people to sit and hold them and so she still would have been standing!

I think my Mom is fun and has a good sense of humor.  She is good at being friends with people, and at helping a variety of people with a variety of things.  She is not perfect because none of us are, but she is a really good person, who doesn't really ever realize how wonderful she is.  I am thankful that she is my Mom.

One of my favorite memories was when she and Dad were getting ready to go on a mission -- to Russia I think.  They were staying here and going over to the Mission Training Center in Provo in the mornings.  Jake was pretty little.  He LOVED having grandma live here and so he would want her to have breakfast with him, and maybe play playdough or something before she left.  I think sometimes she had to have second breakfast, and my parents were occasionally late because my Mom couldn't say no to a cute little boy who loved her.  (And still loves her).

I love my Mom!

Beautiful Squash Plants and Super Villain Squash Bugs!!

My beautiful zucchini plants

I like my squash plants.  I think they are really beautiful, and they sure know how to make whatever squash it is that they were meant to make!  Every year I have had squash bugs.  My friend told me I needed to toughen up because I would apologize to them as I grabbed them and squished them.  This year there were a LOT.  I hired Dan to pick them off and get rid of them.  Even with the piles he pulled off, and the ones I pulled off there were lots and lots left munching on the plants.  Mostly they weren't as bad on the zucchini plant.  It looks good.

This is the surviving Pumpkin plant which is pretty too.

This is a bad picture of the sadly killed pumpkin plants.  The squash bugs won that round!

Unfortunately, with all of our grabbing of squash bugs, we didn't make enough difference to save this one.  I tried spraying evil bug killer (which I have never done) but they kept walking around without being phased.  I figured they had already somehow become radioactive and turned into super villain squash bugs.  Eventually I did a little research and got rid of a lot of them, but I'm sure there are still more in there snacking.  I'm hoping they mostly snack on the dead one and leave the rest alone -- but is that really what a super villain squash bug would do?

God Can Be Found In The Gray Areas

***

I am reading the book Silent Souls Weeping by Jane Clayson Johnson, and I recommend it.  Today I was reading about someone named Kara who struggles with perfectionism and depression.  She said:

"Perfectionists, we deal in the black and white.  There's no gray area.  It's all or nothing.  And that's Satan's plan.  Heavenly Father wants us to live in the gray areas where there's mercy and love, compassion, charity."

Those of us who struggle with perfectionism can feel like we should be able to be perfect right now, but Heavenly Father always knew that we would need a lot of practice.  Growth takes time.  Learning takes time.  I've often had the feeling that surely, if I just think hard enough, I will be able to figure out how to never mess up.  I want to be like the child prodigy who can play the piano perfectly without the hours and hours of practice usually required, except I want to be like that for all of life, and I sometimes have felt like a failure when I couldn't do it.  In these moments, I am forgetting that Heavenly Father did not mean for life to be that way.  It is through our imperfections that we learn and find that God provides help, strength, knowledge, capacity, forgiveness, mercy, and all good things.

The quote above reminded me of a discussion I had years ago with someone who was struggling with his faith.  He said he had always thought things were black and white but that he felt things were more like Billy Joel's song that says, "Shades of gray wherever I go, the more I find out the less that I know."

There are many, many people who struggle with questions, who feel stuck in this gray area where they can't quite see what is right, and what to do or think.  They feel alone, and might even feel ashamed for struggling and having questions.  But it is in that very struggle and working through all of those hard questions with faith that we gain strength, and can eventually find, and come to know God.  In all of life it is in those gray areas, in those daily struggles of life, and in the real challenges we have, that we can best find the God of mercy, love, compassion, and charity.

***Used by permission from churchofjesuschrist.org

Golden Moments: The Gift of A Little Friend

***

Days can be full of all kinds of moments.  Peaceful, hectic, sad, overwhelmed, funny, happy ...  All kinds of moments.  Sunday was no exception, but I was having a few too many moments where I felt sad.  When it was time for church we were running late.  I hate running late.  We had company, which was great, but as soon as the prayer was said and Connor was leaving I announced that I was going with him and left everyone else behind.

Connor had a friend waiting for him and the three of us went in and got a bench to save.  Then, as we were waiting, a little boy who is in Primary (the children's organization at church) saw me and his face lit up.  I love those moments!  And then, to my surprise, he asked his Mom if he could come sit by me.  And he did.  Right next to me.  He snuggled close just as the rest of my family arrived. 

I kept waiting for him to get intimidated by a bunch of people he doesn't know sitting by him, but he didn't.  Honestly, I kept thinking he would look at me and decide he didn't know me either.  I haven't ever taught his class -- but I have been in front of the room, and led the music quite a bit.  He told me about his new sister, and his rocket bike that is red.  He goes to kindergarten this year and I found out that he is really good at finding hymns by their numbers.  He told me his brothers names and could point out another member of his Primary class.  He stayed snuggled up close to me until after the Sacrament and then went to join his family.

These were golden moments for me.  I kept looking around thinking -- does anyone see this?  He came to sit by me!  He chose me!  Could there be a nicer tender mercy than the gift of a little friend?  I have told the Primary children before that they make a difference for good.  I have explained how them smiling at me has often made me feel happy and loved.  Some of them look surprised, but I think that we can all, no matter what our age, create golden moments through kindness!  I am thankful for a little boy who helped me feel noticed and loved and created a much needed golden moment for me.

**Watercolor by Phyllis Luch used by permission from churchofjesuschrist.org

The Cool Kids

During all of my growing up years I never thought of myself as one of the "cool kids", but when you ride in Connor's car he hands you sunglasses and ......

Cool Kids!!!
Me, Trisa, Kayli and Connor looking awesome on our way home from church.
All of this time I only needed a good set of sunglasses! :-)

Cool Kids!
Kayli, Terri (our friend), and Connor looking cool on their way home from work.

Charlie and Emma

This past weekend we had a chance to go up to the Ogden Temple to attend the wedding of our nephew Charlie to Emma.  We love them!

This is Charlie and Emma.  We love them.
We didn't get any pictures of them in their wedding attire.  They looked great!

Connor, Derek and Me on the temple grounds after the wedding
with my Mom and Chris in the background.

My Family(Siblings and Parents)
Brian, Jenny, Dad, Mom, Ray, Me, Tina
It is great to have special occasions because then we get to see each other!

Audrey, Trisa, and Tia
(At the reception)

Cousins:  Audrey, Lauren, Kayli, Maddie, Tia, and Trisa

Most of my kids love cereal, so they were pretty pleased that Charlie and Emma had a cereal bar at their reception.  They also had a "cake" that was beautifully stacked donuts.  The weather was lovely and it is good to celebrate such a happy occasion.

Connor came with Derek and Me.  The girls came up later for the reception.

How Do You Come Up With Things To Say?

My Dad asked me this when he was visiting.  I explained that some days I have a lot to say.  I've found ideas I'm interested in, or have just noticed things I'd like to share.  Sometimes there are things happening with the family that can be shared -- birthdays, weddings, etc.  And then, there are days like today.  I sit and stare at the screen and can't settle on anything.  And then I remembered the reunion when someone asked what you write about in a journal when you can't think of anything -- and I said to write about what you are grateful for.  This isn't exactly a journal, and I just did this the other day, but no day is the same!  So here's a quick list.

I'm thankful that:
**Jake mowed the lawn today so I didn't have to.
**Teddy is really funny when he attacks hoses (though that means he gets tied up so he doesn't tromp on the plants!)
**Derek called me from work and he is kind and thoughtful.
**The squash bugs didn't kill all the pumpkin plants.
**Rain has made the lawn look mostly green again!
**The van is great to drive around.
**Connor and Kayli both checked to see how I was doing during their lunch break.
**Jake and Dan ran right out and helped bring in groceries without being asked!
**We have laundry machines and so I did not have to do laundry by hand today!
**I have so much to be thankful for!

Happy Day!

Memorizing Scripture

Used by permission -- churchofjesuschrist.org

Back in the old days when I was in seminary we had scriptures that we were to memorize if we could.  I am thankful for all of those that I memorized and managed to remember.  I have been thinking lately how I should find a scripture verse for various circumstances and memorize them so that, in that circumstance, I will have a solution, or encouragement, or guidance that I can pull out to help me.  (I seem to talk a lot about memorizing quite a bit lately without actually having done any yet!).  I guess just finding the scriptures would be a good start!

Here are a some scriptures I like:

For hard times, discouragement, or times when inclined to beat oneself up:

Hebrews 4:  15-16:  "For we have not an high priest (Jesus) which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin.  Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need."

When tempted to be quick to judgment or anger:

James 1:19:"...let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath"

When I just want to do what I want without considering what God wants (and because it makes me smile):

James 1:21:  "Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls." 

When I want to help someone but don't know how:

James 5:16:  "...pray one for another, that ye may be healed.  The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much."

And finally for any time I need to remember that I am loved, and so is everyone else:

 1 John 4:9"In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through him."

I would love to know the scriptures that you pull out in different circumstances to help you!

Grasping For Gratitude

***

I have, on occasion, felt like I was reaching out and trying to grasp gratitude, but it was illusive.  Other times, when I have been very stressed, it has been hard to take my mind away from my worries and into gratitude.  But I firmly believe that finding gratitude, especially in the midst of our hardest times, is a key to perspective, peace, and joy.  I have been taught this lesson over and over through a variety of circumstances.  So here are some things I am grateful for.

This very beautiful world we live in.  This morning as Jake was driving to drivers ed there were streams of sunlight coming out of a hole in the clouds.  It was so beautiful!

Music.  It once again came to my rescue this morning.  It was early, and I knew I wasn't going to sleep more because I was feeling sad, and was worrying over some things.  Then I decided I could sing, and I remembered that I used to sing a song with the line "Let the sunshine in, face it with a grin, smilers never lose and frowners never win".  I sang it so much that my roommate had it memorized.  So, even though it wasn't sunny this morning, I sang it and smiled.

The humor to be found in simple things.  I set an alarm on Alexa this morning and when it went off I said, "Thank you Alexa", which didn't turn the alarm off but did have her talking through the alarm and sounding very thankful for my gratitude!

Hugs.  All of my boys hugged me this morning.  They are such good boys, and so good to their Mom!

Friends.  One sent me a thoughtful text this morning, one picked up Jake when he got out of class early, and there are others out there who smile and are kind when they see me, and that makes a difference!

I am thankful for the fact that there are people who actually read what I write, which I think is sweet! 

I am thankful for all of the encouragers in my life.  I hope you have a lot of them in your life too, and that you can find the strength to find things to be grateful for no matter how hard life gets.

*** I'm also thankful for people who share their beautiful photos for me to use!
Photo by 周 辰曦 on Unsplash

Ride Fearlessly and Triumphantly

***

I will smile at the rage of the tempest, and ride fearlessly and triumphantly across the boisterous ocean of circumstance ... and the 'testimony of Jesus' will light up a lamp that will guide my vision                through the portals of immortality."              (Eliza R. Snow)

I found this quote this morning and it describes how I want to be, and what I am trying to be.  Maybe if I say it aloud when I am feeling discouraged, or afraid, or picked on, it will remind me that I can trust my Savior and that no matter how dark it seems in my life at that moment, my testimony of Christ can help guide my thoughts and my actions until the darkness has passed and all is light again!

***Photo by Johannes Plenio on Unsplash (Isn't it beautiful?)

The End of The Home Phone

We have had the same home phone number since 1993 when we moved to Payson.  My parents moved so often that I got more than one call from relatives trying to find out where they were and how they could get in touch with them.  People knew my number would be the same -- and now it isn't.  It was surprisingly stressful for me to cancel that number even though some of the younger generation don't even know what a home phone is, and mostly it was used by telemarketers -- and people who had discovered that they could get in touch with me that way when I forgot to turn the sound on my cell phone -- or had temporarily misplaced it.

So with the home phone cancelled, I needed to send back the box connecting the internet and the phone and the computer.  So I took it apart, and tried to figure out where to plug in things so that the internet would still work.  I could get it working on the main computer but not on anything else.  I was so frustrated.  I took time to eat so I wouldn't cry -- and then called our internet provider.  The nice man was helpful and finally decided to send someone out since he could see that our service wasn't quite as good as it had been originally anyway.

So a different nice man came yesterday, asked to see the router, and said something like, "Oh, this is funny".  He then proceeded to push a button and then said, "It should work now".  And it did.  I just laughed.  I'm sure in all of my turning the router on and off I had accidentally pushed something that shouldn't be pushed!  Anyhow he did get on the roof (with some wasp spray) and re-aim the thing on the roof so it wasn't aiming through a tree and so our service is better now anyway. 

I did realize as I was leaving Dan at home yesterday that he had no way to call anyone when he is home alone -- so now one of my old cell phones is being used as a tracfone with enough paid minutes to get him help if he ever needs it.  It's still cheaper than having a home phone -- but I still mourn the loss of something that has been a constant in our lives for so long.

***Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

Transformation

Our kitchenette, that we had for years and years, flooded a year and a half ago and has now been transformed into a library.  I scrolled through years of pictures this morning but didn't find a single one of the kitchenette.  It seems like we never held special occasions there and so it wasn't photographed much.  It is really hard to actually show a transformation when you can't find the before picture!  I know I took some when we were ripping out the moldy cabinets and the old floor, but those are missing too.  Sad!  I guess there is no looking back!  Here is the library.  With all of the craziness of life, it took a long time to finish, but it looks great!  Derek and Jake did the majority of the work.  I did the painting.

The library with it's twin bed sized reading nook.  We bought some pillows and the zebra one was donated by Tia.  There are lights on either side of the reading nook, or you can turn on the bright one like is shown here.

Dan posing for me.  He looks surprisingly like Jake in this one!

I started loading books yesterday.  I'm not done.  I have to figure out which books go on which bookcases!
You can see the floor a little here.  It matches the wall at the back of the reading nook.

Just one more view.  We love our library!  

Our kitchenette was used almost exclusively to store things.  The library has a hidden storage compartment under the mattress, but will be used for reading.  I think it will get a lot more than the kitchenette did.  So, while it was only changed because of a stealthy leak in the sink, I think it is a really good transformation!