I was looking for a picture to go along with my quote and this one is as close a match as I could find. Mrs. Potato head is trying to help -- even though she isn't sure what Mr. Potato head needed.
"...if we aren't clear on what we want and need, we can never expect others to support our efforts."
from The Complete Idiot's Guide to Tai Chi and QiGong Illustrated
by Bill and Angela Douglas
This quote reminds me of two things.
1. If we know what we want or need, hinting to get it is a bad plan. It is also a bad plan to expect someone else to just know. Even our closest friends and family aren't mind readers! People like to help, and they even like to give us things that we want, but it is very hard for anyone to do that if we haven't clearly let them know what it is we want or need!
2. People have a hard time helping us with a problem, or supporting us in an effort, we haven't identified. Sometimes I have been out of sorts, and have found myself getting grumpy at Derek for not miraculously solving the problem. This is totally unfair in any case, but especially when I don't even know why I'm grumpy or what I want or need to solve it.
*picture from folksdaily.com but it's obviously really from Toy Story.